I’ve seen some pretty dramatic press releases, but few standouts like the one I received via e-mail today.

From PR-Inside.com:

“KEANE TOOK DRUGS TO PAY FOR THE MUSIC

British rockers KEANE had to sell their bodies to medical science to finance their early music careers.

The SOMEWHERE ONLY WE KNOW trio’s frontman TOM CHAPLIN was so broke that he took drugs as part of a medical trial.

Drummer RICHARD HUGHES tells, ‘Did he not tell you about the medical trial? I think it was £80 he got for testing this drug. I remember meeting him for lunch the morning after he did it.

‘It was a schizophrenia drug. I mean, I don’t suppose you’re expected to take schizophrenia drugs unless you’re schizophrenic. And if you’re not, they probably have the wrong effect. I think it was OK, but then you never know if you’re the one who got the placebo.’”

KEANE is TAKING DRUGS and SELLING THEIR BODIES? Oh no, wait . . . their singer tested pharmaceuticals for some cash once.

I don’t know what publicist wrote this, but it WREAKS OF DESPERATION. It’s the type of tidbit that belongs in chit-chat with David Letterman—not as a stand-alone press release. But it sure has a sensational headline!

Link

The Addiction Research Unit at University at Buffalo’s Department of Psychology has posted a series of images of psychotropic substances that were legally available in the United States and Europe in the preprohibition era.

Among other gems, the morphine-laced Mrs. Winslow’s Soothing Syrup for teething children.

From the website:

“Morphine, cocaine, and even heroin were seen as miracle cures when they were first discovered. During the mid to late 19th century, many manufacturers proudly proclaimed that their products contained cocaine or opium. “

Link

If it burns when you pee (and you happen to be a monkey), the American Urological Association has some good news for you!

A potent synthetic version of a chemical found in THC, the principal active ingredient of marijuana, has been found to suppresses pain in hypersensitive bladder disorders, according to results presented today at the association’s annual meeting.

The chemical has only been tested in animal models so far, so if you happen to be a human, the discovery won’t alleviate your burning sensations for quite some time.

Hopefully they’ll put a rush order on this one so you can throw out those little pink pills from the drugstore that you keep tucked in the back of the bathroom cabinet. You know, the ones that turn your urine redish orange?

Link (via Medical News Today)